Maggie Lee — Family questionnaire

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What languages get spoken in your house, and who speaks which to whom?

We speak English at home, but I've made an effort to try to speak Korean with my mom.

Describe a normal weeknight dinner at your house.

A classic, classic dinner consists of rice, mandu (Korean dumplings) OR yangnyeom dubu (tofu), and banchan (Korean side dishes like kimchi). Either that, or we have gyeran bibim (rice, fried egg, soy sauce, and sesame oil mixed together) with jang-jorim (marinated beef) and banchan. Always eaten with chopsticks and shallow spoons!!

What is in your kitchen that would not be in most of your friends' kitchens?

Recycled glass jars (to store kimchi and other side dishes), a drawer full of instant ramen, a sujeo-ham (storage box on the kitchen table for chopsticks and spoons), and individual metal rice bowls.

Where does your family food shop, and how far do they drive to do it?

We do our regular grocery shopping weekly at our local stores, like Trader Joe's, Roche Bros, and Stop and Shop, but we also go to H-Mart in Burlington every two weeks or so (30 min drive without traffic).

What happens in your house on a Sunday?

When it's nice out, my family usually spends the weekend doing outdoor work, whether that's raking leaves, tending the garden, picking weeds, mowing the lawn, etc. We also go to church together on Sunday mornings.

Is there a word or phrase your family uses at home that does not really translate?

noon-chi: the art of reading the room

What sport, instrument or activity did you end up doing — and who decided?

I played soccer and basketball up until sophomore year; my parents chose soccer because it's a really big part of the Natick community, and basketball was mostly me. Primarily, though, I'm a musician. My parents made me and my sisters play piano since elementary school, and I later chose to play the saxophone (kept playing piano up until sophomore year).

What do your parents expect of you, said out loud or not?

Respect and kindness. It was ingrained in us from an early age that we were to be respectful and kind to all people, and that started at home.

What do you get asked about being Asian American that you are tired of being asked?

Are you from China or from Asia? North or South Korea? Why aren't you good at ________? Do you eat ________? (usually dog, or some other animal)

What was the first job or business anyone in your family had in America?

Although my maternal grandmother had her bachelor's degree from one of the most prestigious universities in Korea (Seoul National University), she was forced to fully reset her life once she and her children (my mother) immigrated to the States. In Korea, she had been somewhat of a nutritionist and had her own cooking show (all the facts might not be completely right), but in America, she started back at square one, and opened an Asian restaurant (Chopstix, at a mall in Oklahoma).

What city or neighbourhood did your family first live in when they arrived?

Dad's side: grandparents came to the US in the 1960s and moved outside of Cleveland, where my grandfather still resides
Mom's side: grandmother, mother, aunt, and uncle came to the US in 1980 and moved to Moore, OK where my grandmother's two sisters (and their families) were living. Now, that same family unit lives in Texas (Houston, San Antonio, and Plano/Dallas)

I live in Natick, MA.

Is there something your family does not talk about?

All my grandparents grew up during the Korean War, and it's still a pretty touchy topic, especially for my paternal grandfather.

Who in your family would you most want interviewed properly, and why?

I'd like to interview both my grandparents (maternal grandmother + paternal grandfather).

What do you want someone to know about your family in a hundred years?

I want people to know how strong and resilient my family is. My mother's side of the family had to face extreme hardship, what with my grandfather passing away when my mother was young and my grandmother being a single-mom (with a strong support system, but she had to leave Korea to achieve it). My paternal grandparents had to walk across Korea during the Korean War, and after persisting and surviving the war, were able to build a life together in the States despite not knowing anyone.

Anything else?

One cool thing is that I am related to Admiral Yi Sun-Sin (Korean military general who, despite being the underdog, won all his naval battles against Japan) and King Sejong (King of Korea during the Joseon Dynasty who created the Korean alphabet).

Held, not published

• Contributor's contact details (never published).

Editorial notes

• The contributor agreed to be contacted and named both grandparents as people she would want interviewed properly; a follow-up recorded interview is a natural next record.